Wednesday, September 17, 2008

SASUKE 21 Fall 2008 The Sort of Live Blog! SASUKE 2008 秋! SASUKE 21回! 

Power! Speed! Balance!

Firemen! Fishermen! Octopus Men! Freerunners! Olympic medalists! Comedians! Comediennes! American Ninjas! Handball players! It can only be SASUKE!

It's the SASUKE 21 Fall 2008 sort of live blog!

My gosh, Sky High must have been a big ole hit back in the day in Japan. Whither thou Jigsaw?

There be spoilers from here on in if you are waiting to see the show elsewhere.

If you are from G4, DON'T POST THIS THERE.

Let's go!

We're in black and white! It's to stress the bleakness of the last SASUKE where a DAMN WHITE MAN was the only person left standing. At least Kane is part Japanese.

And the Japanese vs. the world (not just America) is an old trope in Japanese sports entertainment.

People are in line! Wakky! Passion Yara! Moeyan! Dante! Matsunaga! Henry Cejudo!

He's here to take the gold to um..go along with his other one? Did someone tell him that they don't give out medals?

Daisuke Miyazaki and his men of hands on balls!

More comedians! Higedanshaku!

Ninja Warrior! Take a drink!

Toshihiro Takeda! Mr. SASUKE NOT wearing a white tank-top!

It's an overcast but probably humid day at Midoriyama!

Survival Attack SASUKE!

1st Stage!

Hey wait, he's not supposed to be announcing. I thought he only did the Spring ones? Whatever.

Shot of the course.

1. Matsuno Flying disc guy! Steps. Log Grip. NO! He was almost there.

2. Passion Yara! He's pumped up with that red P on his shirt. It means Passion! Steps. Log Grip coming up. YES! Barely. Pole Maze. Whoa! Almost went too low there. And...he's almost..through! Yes! He's from Okinawa. Jumping Spider coming up. Passion YARAAAHHHHH!

4. Double Dutch champion Oda Kenta! Steps. He's going to fail the Log Grip. See? He was the dude in the commercial.

5. Miyamoto Yuke! He's a monk! His family is there! That's not good. Steps. Whoa! Almost fell but he held on! Log Grip! Miyamoto YUKE! Pole Maze. He's 34. Yes! Jumping Spider. Here he goes! NO! He was up then he was down. The children are too young to understand FAILURE.

9. Wan Jen! He's from the Muscle Musical! Ikimasu! OK! He's from China. Log Grip. Yes! More people are through the Log Grip early this year. Pole Maze. He does a flip onto the Jumping Spider platform. He's up! He can't hold on then goes head first into the water!

10. Hirayoshi something! He's a bodyguard! A Bae Yon bodyguard? Wait! He doesn't have his shoes on! And he's wasted tons of time! He's...methodical. Log Grip. Pole Maze. And he's stuck. And Wakky is all "comedian" pissed at the bodyguard! He tries to get back to the original platform but falls in!

12. Higuchi-kun of Higedanshaku! No! Log Grip! He was our first edit.

13. Louis Yamada the 53rd! Steps! NO! He couldn't make that final step! The All-Stars get a laugh out of that.

19. Ku Honpei? He was an Olympic trainer. Doushita! He fell on the first step! Let's see that again! Ah. He slipped off the platform. He's the first to not make a step.

20. It's the crush the apple dude! Holy Crap! He was on Sportsman No. 1! And he RAN into the Monster Box! He's got weights! He's lost his hair! Steps. Log Grip. He fell here last time I think. Well, he does this time. Maybe he blew himself lifting the weights. Torisawa? I'll check later.

My arms are sore. CM...break..needed.

26. Oops I missed his name. Kanui? Kamei I think. Steps. Log Grip. He's a sports trainer. Pole Maze! Wait. He needs to go back! Another try. Hiromichi Sato is cheering him on. He's through! Jumping Spider! YES! Spider Walk. Half-Pipe Attack coming up. Yes! NO! He landed butt first on the platform and hit the water. Mottainai!

Digest. Darvish Mohammaed, someone called Brian Phillip Harlow?, Tanaka Something, Ida Koji, Takahashi Mitsuomi (at the Jumping Spider) fail!

29. Nomura Masaki! Here he goes. Steps. Log Grip coming up! He didn't get past this last time. He gets set. YES! He's through! Yatta! Pole Maze! Stuck in the middle. He needs to move the pole over. Don't try to reach it! Oh never mind. Jumping Spider coming up! No-mu-ra! Jumping Spider! No! He didn't get high enough. Scratch that, he didn't even get up off the trampoline.

30. Ishimaru Kenjiro! He's been waiting half a year for this! Here he goes. Steps. Log Grip. Yes! Pole Maze. No...problem! Jumping Spider. Can he do it? Jumping Spider! Ishimaru dou daaa? Yes! Spider Walk is no problem! Half-Pipe Attack! Here he goes. YES! YES! YES! Soritatsu Kabe up next. FIRST TRY! OH MY! CMs.

Man, that's a lot of stuff we've been through in the first fifteen minutes. Wow.

When I think reggae I think Fukuoka!

We're back! Soritatsu Kabe! Yes! Flying Chute. Here he goes. Ye..NO! Aaah! So close. Did he have enough time anyway? Flying Chute Ishimaru! He couldn't hold on to the rope.

Damn his arms are big.

Tatsumi! No number. He's from the Muscle Musical. I think he fails the Jumping Spider. Steps was an ALMOST. Log Grip. Pole Maze. Slight hitch at the end. He's through! Jumping Spider. NO! He was almost there! Damn commercials spoiling it for everyone.

Olivia Munn gets a minimum of air time as she fails the Steps. 

More digest. Three more people meet the muddy waters of Midori-yama.

Ninja Warrior!

35. Luci Romberg! Here she goes! Steps. No problem. Log Grip! Yes! Pole Maze! Kore mo ii! Jumping Spider. YES! She's sticking it to the boys! Girl Power! CMs.

Jeez Norika Fujiwara has some long legs.

Hokuto no Ken! Pachinko!

Back! Ninja Warrior! Spider Walk. No problem! Half-Pipe Attack! Here she..NO! Luci..ROMBERG! The All-Stars react! Not the first stage but the farthest a woman has gone since Chie Nishimura.

Yoshino Momomi! She was there. I thought so. According to Yoshino's blog, Seimiya Yuumi was there too. Some kid, Aoki the creepy sculptor guy and Hang Glider guy all meet their watery doom.

SASUKE Trial Qualifier time!

41. Kubota Takayuki! The Trial guys cheer each other on! Steps. Log Grip coming up. Yes! Pole Maze. Yes! No problem. Jumping Spider. Wa..Yes! Spider Walk. He's having some problems here. Taking a bit of time. Half-Pipe Attack. NO! He slipped running up the platform!

His foot left a nifty little mark on the wall.

42. Hashimoto Koji! Steps. Log Grip coming up. OK! Yume no SASUKE! Pole Maze. OK! Jumping Spider. YES! Hashimotoooo! Spider Walk. Half-Pipe Attack da! Yes! Wait. YES! Soritatsu Kabe. NO! Try again! NO! He needs it this time. NO! Don't give up! NO! For PRIDE! The time goes red for the first time today. Soritatsu Kabe Time-Up!

Murkami Akinori also times out at the Soritatsu Kabe.

Sato Jun! He falls at the Log Grip.

Kazuma Asa times out at the Soritatsu Kabe too! Oh my.

SASUKE Trial members are falling one by one.

The last three are coming up

46. Matachi Ryo! He's 19. Steps. Log Grip coming up. Jishin ga aru! Pole Maze. Hitch at the end. Yes! Jumping Spider. Yes! Nice jump there. Hayai! He FLIES through the walk portion. Half-Pope Attack. Yes! Soritatsu "SASUKE TRIAL KILLER" Kabe. First time. NO! Second try. YES! Flying Chute! There he goes! CMs.

SASUKE for your keitai!


Flying Chute. He can't reach the ladder. Don't try..NO!

Makoto Nagano drops wisdom. Shingo Yamamoto laughs.

47. Kawaguchi Tomohiro! Let's see his entry video again. Ganbarimasu. I just noticed that the graphic is talking about the next generation of All-Stars. Foreshadowing? Steps. Log Grip. Pole Maze. Jumping Spider. Yes! He moves in a frank manner. Half-Pipe Attack. Ita! WAIT! NO! What happened? Course Out! Dammit. He lost his balance. Dammit.

48. Mr. SASUKE's Assassin! Takuya Miyagi! No wonder I didn't recognize him before. He shaved his hair. DON'T LISTEN TO YAMADA! Not having hair makes him look years younger. He's the last of the SASUKE Trial Qualifiers. Here he goes! Steps. Log Grip. Yes! Pole Maze. Yes! Jumping Spider. NO! His right foot missed.

Thus endeth the dream of the SASUKE Trial Qualifiers.

48 have tried! None have passed! YOU SHALL NOT PASS!

49. Lee Yen Chi! Or Lee Enchi. Whatever. He's back! He passed the 1st stage in his first try. But things are different now! Steps. Log Grip. Taiwan no top climber! Pole Maze. Can he be the first. That's right, he missed on the Jumping Spider his second try. But he's fine this time! Half-Pipe Attack. He looks a lot older. Yes! Yes! Soritatsu Kabe. Does he have enough time? He'll have to do it in two! He does it in one! Flying Chute. Yes! He slowed himself down tons by crouching. He's through! The first to do so! Kiroi gate! CMs. You're killing us TBS.


Let's look at what might be the best way to attack the Flying Chute - slowing down. Tarzan Rope. Can he make it? The time is going to go red soon. YES! YES! With exactly four seconds left! Cue Yagyu-Gaiden! Thank you for coming back!

Yup, by crouching he could control and time his jump better.

It's the hair.

So far the course is um..exactly the same.

50. Mark Whitmer! Ninja Warrior! Steps. Log Grip. NO! AH! Hold on! Oh no! Oh my.

I guess that was all he had to offer. He's happy. G4 WILL NOT BE!

50 have tried! 1 shall pass!

51. Takahashi Hiromitsu! Oh yeah baby. Look at that thong on the Rolling Log. Steps. I want him to pass. Log Grip. YES! Pole Maze. Stuck in the middle with you. Uh oh. Taking too much time. Finally! But he has less than 65 seconds left. Jumping Spider. Yes! He's up! Go! Go! Go! Half-Pipe Attack. UP! And no! Damn. The Muscle Musical girls are there! With pink shirts. To let you know they are girls.

55. Iwanaga Sho! He handles balls! Genius Handball Player! Steps. Neat overhead shot. Log Grip. Yes! Cut to the Half-Pipe Attack! Subarashii! He almost lost it! Soritatsu Kabe. Does he have enough time? He must have got stuck on the Pole Maze. Flying Chute as the time goes red. Flying Chuuuuuuuuuuuuto!

That's some dirty water.

59. Oya! He's the Random Muscle Park Staff Guy. He's a Muscle Park demonstrator. Potential? Steps. Log Grip. Pole Maze! Jumping Spider! NO! Demonstrator no Oyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! They don't have one of those at Muscle Park.

A bicyclist. Priest. Dante. Yamamoto Hiroshi all wipe out. So much for that.

70. Setoda! He's from the Muscle Musical. Steps. Log Grip. Pole Maze. Hitch at the end. He goes up to YES! He's through. It cost him time though. Jumping Spider. Whoa! Performance ka! Yes! I think I know why Levi did what he did. Setoda is through. Half-Pipe Attack! He looked very straight as he fell into the water. Shingo Yamamoto looks on! He did a handstand on the trampoline.

That hat! That uniform! It can only be Yamamoto Shingo! This year he started participating in SASUKE events. Only Lee Yen Chi has made it through so far.

70 have tried! ONE has passed!

71. Yamamoto Shingo! Here he goes! Our first All- Star. Steps. Log Grip. Always look for the "careless miss" with Shingo. Pole Maze. Jumping Spider. Yes! No problem! Nice form on the Walk. Half-Pipe Attack. Wait. Wait. YES! Daijouba da! Soritatsu Kabe! First Try! Yamamoto Shingo! Flying Chute. Yes! Wait for it. Wait for it. Don't rush. He's stuck. He needs to get momentum. NO. NO. Not like this! NO! His foot finally drags the water! Nandda! Shut up Yamada.

You NEED the rebound to get to the next part.

Digest. Red Moeyan. Keitaro Katayama fails the Flying Chute. Norio Haryu was SO CLOSE (he was at the climb). Damn.

75. Brian Orosco! Don't edit the wiki man! Steps. Log Grip. Yes! Pole Maze. No problem! Umaku clear! Jumping Spider. YES! He's through! Can he do it? His foot is slipping! But he's through! Half-Pipe Attack! Yes! Soritatsu Kabe. He's from California! First try! Flying Chute! Here he goes. Yes! Wait. He's stuck too. Yes! He's through! Does he have time? Tarzan Rope! GO! GO! GO! Time goes red! C'mon! CMs.



Tarzan Rope. Time is going red! C'mmon! YES! YES! YES! 0.68! Less than a second left!

He had to DIVE to the button. He almost broke the damn thing.

Man, that's awesome!

Digest. Kongo Express. Kawashima. Another of the handballers fall.

81. Hiromichi Sato and his grin!

One from Taiwan! One from the US! None from Japan! It's like the Olympics all over again!

Anyway, Sato. Japan is in a pinch! Sato. Steps. I don't really think he'll be the first native but whatever. Log Grip. Pole Maze. Jumping Spider coming up. Yes! He's through! Jumping Spider umai! Half-Pipe Attack. Yes! Abunai! Daijoubu! Soritatsu Kabe. First try! No! Second try. No! Third try. He NEEDS to get it this time. Fourth try. NO! Only one hand. Don't give up! NO! So the Soritatsu Kabe reclaims its spot as a 1st Stage killer. Time up!

82 have tried! 2 have passed! Nobody from the Land of Rising Sun!

83. Shiratori Bunpei! Steps. Log Grip. Pole Maze coming up. Hitch at the end. Shinji Kobayashi is there! Jumping Spider. Yes! That was a HIGH jump. Half-Pipe Attack coming up. YES! No problem! Soritatsu Kabe. Ikkai! Flying Chute.


Was there someone wearing just a speedo running with the All-Stars?


Flying Chute! He snags the ladder with his foot! OK. That was shirtless Yamamoto. Lots of time! Tarzan Rope. He'll be the first native! YES! 3.6 seconds left! The All-Stars are through! Japan is through! Suck on that America and Taiwan!

He lies down in exhaustion! This is the earliest the All-Stars have gotten through in the last two SASUKEs.

He looks SPENT.

86. Muscle Musical member Haga Tomoyo! He'll flip out on the Flying Chute I believe. Damn commercials. Steps. Log Grip. Iketani must be in the 90s. Pole Maze. Jumping Spider. Nice jump! Half-Pipe Attack. Yes! He's through. Soritatsu Kabe! First try! Flying Chute. Last time he fell here! Here he goes! TOO FAST! TOO FAST! He grabs then GOES OVER THE ROPE. Overcompensation, thy name is Haga.

88. Nakata Daisuke! He's been on 8 times. Made the 2nd Stage 6 times and the 3rd Stage 4 times.

One for Taiwan!
One for the U.S.A.!
One for Japan!

Here he goes. Steps. Log Grip. Yes! Pole Maze. Slight hitch but he's through! Jumping Spider! Yes! Half-Pipe Attack. Yes! He's through! Soritatsu Kabe. Yes! First full try! He tried to go straight for it from the side. Flying Chute. Here he goes!



Flying Chute. OOK. Yes. YES! Wait. He's tied up. Yes! Here he goes! Tarzan Rope! Rope Climb! Time! YES! 4.0!

Wow, I think he's the first to try to hit his legs first then his hands on the Jumping Spider.

Climax! The last ten!

Tomohiro Matsunaga! Henry Cejudo! Henry does that open his mouth to stretch his jaw thing a lot.

91. Silver medalist Matsunaga Tomohiro! Here he goes. Steps. Log Grip coming up. Yes! Sasuga something something! Pole Maze! No problem! Jumping Spider. Can he do it? Yes! Sasuga wrestling! Half-Pipe Attack. Wait. Yes! Soritatsu Kabe. Yes! The crowd is impressed. Flying Chute. Yes! Wait. No! Reach out! Yes! Lots of time! Tarzan Rope. Rope Climb. Lots of time! It didn't even go red! 10.4 seconds left!

That's five! Sasuga gin medalist!

I'm here to win!

91 have tried! 5 have passed! That's already equal to the number from the last two SASUKEs combined.

92. Henry Cejudo! Steps. Log Grip. CMs before the Pole Maze.

Dark Temptation! Take a drink!

Bad acting by kids! Camera Kitamura!


Steps. Log Grip. Ninja Warrior dai fan! Pole Maze. Stuck at the end. He's through. Jumping Spider. Henry! Ikeru! Slowly. He's not used to it. Half-Pipe Attack. Will he be outdone by Matsunaga. Henry! Henry! HENRY!

Shut up Yamada. Don't comment unless you can do it.

He...tried to hug the rope. Not grab it. And he says the same thing I just said. Biter.

I'm just glad this wasn't at the Olympics!

93. Iketani Naoki! 120 seconds to clear by the way. Steps. Log Grip. Pole Maze. Slowly. Through! Jumping Spider. High! Takai! Same thing. This is where he fell last time. Through! Half-Pipe Attack. Yes! Soritatsu Kabe. Yes! Flying Chute. NO! Same thing as Haga! He went too fast and flipped over the rope! He really really JUMPED for it and just overshot it. Neat way to go out though.

94. Wakky! Or Wacky! Whatever! Here he goes! Steps. Log Grip. They've really cut down on the comedy this year. Through! Wakky is a serious competitor by the way. Pole Maze. Jumping Spider. NO! OUCH! He got up then fell right on the trampoline. Shinjirarenai Wakky!

96. Is Mr. SASUKE! Wait. Who was 95? Go back to the list! Go back to the list! Yay! The Crying Mr. SASUKE clip! DOWN THE WHOLE BOTTLE! He hasn't passed the first stage since the 12th.

MUSASHI earns money as we hear the Mr. SASUKE theme. FALL ON THE STEPS. No. Darn.

You've really made the grade! And the..oh sorry. We're back.

Steps. I don't know what I'll do if he passes. Seriously. Log Grip. Through. Pole Maze. Through. Iiyo. Ii! Jumping Spider. He builds suspense. He's up! KE! Nagano is YELLING at him. Spider Walk. He needs to pick up the pace. He falls! Daijouba ka? I mean he fell on the platform. He's not out yet. Half-Pipe Attack. Clear! Jeez Nagano, calm down. Soritatsu Kabe. No! Wait. Did he hurt his leg when he fell? The time is going red! Time up! Time up! Whew. Is he going to cry? Cry! Cry! Nope.

97. Miyazaki Daisuke! Steps. Log Grip coming up. He looks scared as he does so but he's through! Pole Maze. Yes! Jumping Spider. Yes! Mr. Handball! Spider Walk. Bit of a slip. Half-Pipe Attack. Wait. Wait. Yes! First time I saw that happen. Soritatsu Kabe. Yes! Flying Chute coming up. Can he do it? Here he goes. Wait. Wait. Don't rush. Yes! He's through. Tarzan Rope coming Up. He has lots of time. Rope Ladder. Time is going to go red. Hurry! Hurry! YES! 0.9 seconds left! Justification for the number!

Sasuga Ace!

That's six!

Takeda up next. Let's look at his career as a fireman. He was on a poster you know. He's not done well the last three times out. Is it his time?

97 have tried! 6 have cleared!

98. Takeda Toshihiro! Steps. Log Grip coming up. Yes. Do it for the orange pants! Pole Maze. Whoa. A bit of trouble but he's through. Jumping Spider. Yes! Spider Walk. No problem. Half-Pipe Attack. Wait. Wait. Yes! Soritatsu Kabe! FIRST TRY OFF OF THE SIDE PLATFORM! Flying Chute. Wait. Yes! He's SOOOOOOOO going for the best time. Tarzan Rope. Rope Climb. Lots of time! 15.7 seconds left!

Show-off. He hit the button emphatically! See, that's the way to showboat during SASUKE. Not doing some flip or something like the Muscle Musical people did.

Cue the freerunning clips! Who else could it be? It's Levi Meeuwenberg! By virtue of his last run he gets...

99. Levi Meeuwenberg. Ahh. I see. It's the American Ace (Levi) vs. the Japanese Ace (Nagano). Here he goes. Steps. Log Grip. Freerunning is the word of the day! Pole Maze. Yes! Jumping Spider. There's the flip! He's up! No problem. Half-Pipe Attack. Yes! Soritatsu Kabe. First try. NO! Second try. Yes! Flying Chute. Yes! No problem! Another roll. Tarzan Rope. He's going to beat Takeda's time. Through! 21.5 seconds left! And he does a flip! The crowd is split between awed, cheering and just kind of watching.

Well, it was part performance and part SASUKE. That's pretty much all you can say. It's how he moves!

Does that put pressure on Nagano?

99 have tried! 8 have cleared. One is left! And he is THE ONE.

100. Nagano Makoto! Steps! Log Grip. He's so damn smooth. Pole Maze. Jumping Spider coming up. Yes! Hayai! Hayai! Half-Pipe Attack. Wait. Yes! Soritatsu Kabe. First try! Flying Chute. Yes! Tarzan Rope. Nagano says SCREW TIMES. I CAN DO THIS WITH MY EYES CLOSED! 12.9 seconds left!

Ahahaha! Shinji Kobayashi has shirt that says SASUKE BAKA on the back.

Flips are nice but casually walking through the course and still having time to get through is something only Nagano can do.

9 have passed! AND NOW THE NEWS!

We're back! America! Taiwan! Japan! 9 have passed! Freerunning! Trampoline! Handball! Firefighting! Government work! It's all there in the 2nd stage!

2nd Stage preview. Downhill Jump. Salmon Ladder. Stick Slider. Swing Ladder. Metal Spin. Wall Lifting. YOU HAVE 80 SECONDS.

Lee Yen Chi is first! Downhill Jump. No problem. Salmon Ladder. Slowly. Last one! Stick Slider time? Yes! Swing Ladder. Metal Spin. Yes! Hurry! Hurry! Wall Lifting. NO! Jikan ga nai! No! The Salmon Ladder took too long.

You can't dawdle on the Salmon Ladder.

Lee's failure puts everyone on edge.

Brian Orosco is next! Shooting Star Press! Downhill Jump. Yes. Salmon Ladder. Don't dawdle. First rung. Second rung. Third. CMs.

I think everyone is going to be split over Levi's run. Some will hate it. Some will love it. G4 will LOVE IT and replay it until it's burned into their viewers corneas. Unless he gets to the 3rd Stage again, TBS will treat it as a nice little thing. The chicks will dig it though.


Salmon Ladder. They chan...ahhhhhhhhhhh! Brian Orosco! American Ninja Warrior!

He's happy he made it this far!

Bunpei! You're up. This is a little too much padding for my tastes. Are we going to end up with a SASUKE 20 situation where we ended up with Levi: My Life in Pictures and Words.

Shiratori Bunpei! NO! He lost his balance and slipped! Miyazaki crosses himself after seeing that. Everyone is stunned. Ikinari shippai desu! Matsunaga looks like he's going to cry. Nagano has flashbacks like he's in Nam again.

Nakata Daisuke is next! He's the only one left to represent the Muscle Musical.

I'm soooooooooooooooooo hungry.

I predict...I predict a commercial coming up soon.

Nakata Daisuke! Here he goes! Yes! Salmon Ladder. CMs! YES!

Back. Uh oh. He fell on his hand. Can he even do the Salmon Ladder. First run. No. I think the fall hurt him. DON'T DO IT DAISUKE. C'mon man, it's not worth it. No. No!

He hurt himself after the Downhill Jump. I hope it's not permanent. He tried to stop from sliding off the platform and hurt his wrist.

Five are left!

Matsunaga Tomohiro! He's impassive. Downhill Jump. Yes! Salmon Ladder. Good rhythm. CMs. MORE FOOD!

This is ground control to Major Tom
You've really made the grade
And the papers want to know whose shirts you wear
And the..sorry. Got carried away.

Back. Downhill Jump again. Salmon Ladder. Good rhythm. NO! He tried to go for the last rung and couldn't!

Miyazaki is all freaked out and stuff now.

The final three (Levi, Nagano and Takeda) go their separate ways to prepare.

Let's see Matsunaga again. Only after he's done does he break out a smile.

Miyazaki Daisuke! You're up! Obviously we have over an hour left so someone is making it to the third stage but that's still a LOT of time to fill out.

Here we go!

Downhill Jump. That is so cool. Salmon Ladder. First rung is off. But now he's back on track! Stick Slider! Swing Ladder as we go to CMs and yes, MORE FOOD.


Salmon Ladder again. Stick Slider. Swing Ladder up next. That's rickety! Not all that easy when you think about it. Metal Spin! Wall Lifting! 1! 2! 3! YES!

Cue Yagyu-Gaiden!

That's one!

Mr. Handball!

Nagano Makoto. Just chilling on the side. Takeda Toshihiro! You're up!

One of the two All-Stars! Downhill Jump! Yes! Salmon Ladder. Good rhythm. Yes! Lots of time left! Stick Slider. Swing Ladder. Metal Spin...YES! Oh my. Wall Lifting! 1! 2! 3! No problem!

The All-Stars are through!

Two are left!

Lee and Taked shake hands then realize that they don't speak the same language.

Freerunning! American Ninja! Michael Dudikoff will so sue.

Kore ga kowai!

By the way, for all those watching, no obstacle has been changed yet.

Levi Meeuwenberg is up next! American Ninja Warrior! Downhill Jump. Salmon Ladder. Uh oh. OK, back on track. NO! LEEVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!

"Levi," Makoto whispered to himself. He knew that if he went onwards he wouldn't be alone but Levi. Levi was Levi. Makoto couldn't believe his eyes. He didn't want to believe it. He...wait. Sorry.

Back on track!

He missed on the last rung.

Somewhere, someone is cackling to himself: "Ha! Damn foreigners!"

Olivia goes "We love you" to Levi, probably knowing that it would get her on TV.

Sorry, I got distracted by the story thing.

Well, that kills the whole "Levi is SASUKE Jesus" thing for the time being.

Nagano Makoto! You're up!

Here we go! Downhill Jump. HE'S NOT GOING TO FALL THERE AGAIN! Salmon Ladder is no problem! Salmon Ladder kampeki! Swing Ladder. Metal Spin. Yes! Wall Lifting. 1! 2! 3!

And that's three!

Let's relive the glory again.

3rd Stage!

Pad pad pad pad pad pad pad pad.

If TBS can pad, so can I!

Pad pad pad pad pad pad pad pad.

Arm Ring. Kudari Lamp Grasper. Devil Steps. Shin-Cliff Hanger。Hang Climbing is a revised Ascending Climb.

Miyazaki Daisuke is up first! No time limit. Arm Ring. CMs.


Arm Rings. OK! Nice! SASUKE SPRAY! Kudari Lamp Grasper. He's taking his time. Levi did them between his fingers but Daisuke is gripping each globe. Thr..whoa..THROUGH!

Devil Steps up next. Does he have the strength to get through? Shaky. Shaky. OK. NO!

That's it for Mr. Handball but let's give him a hand!

Kuyashii desu ne.

And then there were two.

Let's look at Miyazaki's run again.

Awkward moment as Miyazaki goes to shake hands with Takeda and Nagano feels like he should do something so he shakes Daisuke's hand too then they just stand there.



Takeda Toshihiro is up! He's never made it to the Promised Land of the Final Stage.

Arm Rings. No problem! SASUKE Spray. Nagano looks like he's a proud father or something looking on as Takeda makes his run. Kudari Lamp Grasper. Such body balance. Takeda clear!

Jishin motte!

Devil Steps coming up. Clear! No problems so far. Bunpei is all smiles. Shut up Yamada. Shin-Cliff Hanger. This is it. Soko de owarideomotte. Nagano thinks that after this is no problem for Takeda. First part is no problem. Slant. Gap coming up. CMs. Are you surprised? Really? You shouldn't be at this point. Damn n00bs.


Here we go. First part. Slant. Gap..............................YES! YES! YES! He did it!

Jumping Bar up next. SASUKE Spray time! Break it down!

One. Two. Three. Four!

Hang Climbing is next. Wait...OH. OK. You can use your feet I guess. Is he stuck? Takeda gambare! Takeda gambare! NO!

Nagano Makoto drinks label-less VOLIC water! VOLIC! The water of choice for SASUKE!

He couldn't get moving. Then he tried to cross over and missed.

And then there was one.

Is there enough time?

At least Takeda earned the distinction of the first person to pass the Shin-Cliff Hanger.

Nagano Makoto! You're up!

Here we go!

Arm Rings. No problems! Hayai! Daijoubu daijoubu! Kudari Lamp Grasper. Nagano hasn't been to 3rd Stage in a year and a half. No problems here either.

Devil Steps. No problems! And here comes the big one. SASUKE Spray time. Itai!

Shin-Cliff Hanger. Ikeru ikeru! Here we go.

First part is fine. Slant. Here comes the gap. YES! YES! YES! Not even a commercial break!

Jumping Bar coming up. Well, whenever Nagano gets around to it. Nagano wa tonda! One. Two. Three. Four! Hang Climbing up next.


Back! Hang Climbing. Here he goes! Sugei na! Through!

Spider Flip! He's at the gap. He'll have to jump across the gap. It's a 2 meter gap?

Taking his time to get set. The man knows a lot. Getting ready. Nagano tobu.

NAGANO TONDA! He's across!

Fina...Gliding Ring! He'll take his time here too.

I don't want to sound pessimistic but time is running out. The longer we sit here and wait, the less chance there is of a completion. Hurry up!

He looks so focused at this point. CMs.

Sorry. I don't think less than ten minutes is enough time to get him across this final obstacle, show a montage and then the Final Stage.


Here he goes. The ring doesn't really move by itself. He needs to get it just right for the last jump. Here we go.


Shut up Yamada.

Damn, that looks hard.

Does he have a tank-top that says "Nagano" on the back?

Ato ichi metoru.

Hontou chikai yo ne?

He didn't even get a chance to try the last jump. He lost his grip on the ring and that was it.

A hug for Daisuke, their awkwardness gone.

Well, we know that everything except the last obstacle, the Gliding Ring, can be done. And we still don't know what the Final Stage is. Still, TBS got a good show out of this. 9 people made the 2nd Stage. 3 made the 3rd Stage. G4 can only be slightly happy. JET too. Two of the bigger mainstream competitors, Matsunaga and Miyazaki got a lot of air time because of their success. And a lot of lesser way less light than we're used to.

That's it! Thanks for watching everyone! See you next time!


Tom said...

Poor Olivia.
Didn't even see Kevin.
Luci did great and I was so happy. Isn't she the first woman to pass the log grip? And to make it to the half pipe attack... Yay.
I was shocked for Mark since he seemed so capable.
Happy Shiratori made it through.
And that's where i'm upto in the show.
Great so far. G4 better make it at least 5 episodes.

Dwizzo said...

Never quite seen anyone do the Spider walk like Henry Cejudo did... He basically was walking through it left-right-left-right! :)

PS - I hate the flying chute, it's going to kill someone one of these days!

karla said...

eeeee levi!!! :DDD
he is really a ninja yay! :D

Dwizzo said...

Levi = Best first stage performance EVER! I bet the first stage will be redesigned to be much harder in Sasuke 22 because of him. PS - It's not showboating, he's a freerunner, that's how they move :)

Nagano = My hero, I love how he just walks the last part of the course like he's taking a stroll in the park...

Nagano and Levi are the perfect compliments to each other in Sasuke!

Janet said...

I am enjoying reading this so much. I can't thank you enough for taking the trouble to blog it all.

SuperNOVA MANIAC said...

I can't watch it right now... but omfg this sasuke is epic already. i need _______________ to upload... you know...

karla said...

eeeee noooooooo
levi.... :(


Arsenette said...

BEST Blog ever Ube .. BEST Blog ever!!!!!!! Glad you got to see everything! Geeeeeeeez that was a nailbiter to watch.. I hate the final ring...

I'll get mine blog up later.. my hands are tired.. friggin 4k pictures I have to sift through.. Meh....

Some Kinda Wonderful said...

Yeah, what Elsie said, Ube. :) Terrific blog.

Michael said...

As always, great write-up!

I'm disappointed that G4 seems to have wasted a slot on Olivia.

I'll keep trying for another chance to redeem myself, but I suspect Stage 1 will be dramatically more difficult for SASUKE 22.

spear said...

Thanks for blogging. This was my first time watching it "live" and the play-by-play made it more enjoyable.

Do you think the Gliding Ring worked as the course designers intended? I wonder if they'll tweak it so that it slides easier next time?

Anonymous said...

LOOOVED IT!! What a great Sasuke!!! I missed the first 90mins, but got to watch all the exciting parts.

LOL reading your blog. My daughter also mentioned something about the guy in the Speedo during the Shiratori run!! (There are two lifeguards to rescue people from the muck. Seriously.)

My husband and I do this thing that when people lose their balance slightly but don't fall off, we say "Oh Yamada would've fell in there."

The most exciting part was when Takeda and Nagano passed the Shin Cliffhanger. Wow.

But check out how FAR that final jump from the ring thing is!! It's like uphill!!!

Thanks for blogging. Now onto RamblingRican...

Anonymous said...

i love nagano!!!! thanks for the updates on sasuke!

Arsenette said...

Thanks Ube for the links to my blog. They are all finally up (9 parts)!