SASUKE Navi March 29th, 2009 Sort of Liveblog! サスケナビ!

Once we again we must thank the pirates of the internet for my ability to watch SASUKE Navi!

For pictures and more commentary, check out here.

SASUKE 22 was filmed on March 16th and will air on March 30th. Hey! That's tomorrow! So today we get SASUKE Navi to tide us over for a show that will be..um..tomorrow. OK, maybe it's all about whetting our appetite.

Who will we see? Who will we not see? Who will only see today and never again? We've got some info here but today we'll fill in more gaps.

It's been a couple months since I've had to do a liveblog. Let's make sure I have everything. Blog. Check. Sports drink. Check. Midget. Check. OK, I think that's it.

Here we go!

Or maybe not. I'm a bit early. They're still showing commercials. Midget! Get over here!

Here we go!

Ohh...looks like some new obstacles.

The final stage!

Miyazaki! Miyashita! SASUKE Trials! Kazuma Asa!

And we are at Midoriyama.

People are waiting in line! They get numbers. And then they will be SHOT. Oh wait.

The All-Stars! Takeda! Akiyama! Yamamoto! Yamada! Nagano!

Daisuke Miyazaki! Men of balls!

Matsunga! Miyashita!

Hiromichi Sato!

Nakao Akiyoshi, guy from Rookies!

Bobby Olugan!

More comedians than you can shake a stick at:

Audrey guy Kasuga Toshiaki!

The guy who is getting married to Miki Fujimoto from Shinagawa Koji, Shinagawa Tomoharu

Wakky!

Dokidoki Camp's Kishi Manabu!

Yamamoto Hiroshi doing his Kane Kosugi impersonation!

Zabungle!

Cherry Pie!

Muscle Musical girls and guys!

White people!

Lee Yen Chi!

Pakuten!

Highlight of 17 when Nagano completed the course. And then highlights of people failing the various new obstacles.

Miyazaki! Izuma! Iwanaga! Let's look at Miyazaki's win at this year's Sportsman No. 1. And then his second run back in SASUKE 21. And his eventual failure during the Devil Steps.

Miyashita Junichi! He won a bronze medal at Beijing. Oh, he's a swimmer. Forgot about that part. Let's watch him swim. And more training! Should I make a comment about how you almost never see any body hair in SASUKE? I think that would be the main difference if the show were made in America.

Audrey! Toshiaki Kasuga! Oh wow, he played football in high school. I mean, he always looked big.

And then let's go to see Nakao Akiyoshi of ROOKIES. He was in 20. And wait...that's a familiar place. Yep, that's Mr. SASUKE's place, ensuring that Nakao will not make it to the 2nd Stage. And he meets Mr. SASUKE. Let's look at his past jobs. And past failures.

CRY YAMADA CRY!

Let's promote the ROOKIES movie! TBS synergy!

You know, ever since I looked up how much those mini-trampolines cost, I wonder how much building that set has put Mr. SASUKE in the hole and how many hot dogs he had to sell to make up for it.

They practice the Jumping Spider. He can do it! And again! No problem! I'm surprised Yamada is wearing a shirt during all this.

Bold prediction! 70 people will make it through the 1st Stage!

And Sato Hiromichi! He continues the All-Star tour! He goes to visit Shiratori Bunpei's place! Sato wants to practice the Soritatsu Kabe. He failed there last time.

They discuss Soritatsu Kabe strategy. And he can't! What a waste of time!

CMs

Back.

They're still trying. I wonder if he's trying Bunpei's patience. And here he goes to show him how it's done. Or maybe not.

Well, that was pointless.

Wakky! Shinagawa Tomoharu! They trained together! Let's look at Wakky at 20. He failed the Half-Pipe Attack (which quite a few people did). The first time he failed the Log Grip. So he and Shinagawa...practice on a real tree.

Two new 1st Stage obstacles!

2. Circle Hammer. Similar to the Metal Swing.

7. Slider Jump. Not quite the same as the Pipe Slider.

SASUKE Jesus! Makoto Nagano! Now let's invade his private life and take a look at his wedding. Is the Final Stage shaped wedding good or bad? The All-Stars nake an appearance. So Asami's job is to...count. The family that trains together stays together!

And let's look at the SASUKE Trials! 2000 people sent in videos and postcards! Let's look at some of them! And let's review last time's STQers. All of them sadly failed the 1st Stage in 21.

OH WOW. Inside look at them choosing the 60. The last eight STQers are all in.

And they are at a track.

First, let's eliminate 30??? Rope. Rope is the key to SASUKE!

A 50 meter dash and then a 30 second tug of war? What? Ah. OK. That's kind of interesting.

Too many faces. I saw Kazuma Asa on the losing side. Matachi Ryo. Mr. SASUKE's assassin. OK, the losing side has to do a 800 meter run. The top ten I believe. Miygai and Asa are through! The winner was Mori something. Murakami and Matachi are out!

Hashimoto Koji! He has 30 seconds to complete a run and then get up an incline to get the flag. Urushihara Yuji is through! Some guys aren't! Kazuma Asa is up next! Yes! No! One more time. NO! Keep going! Ikeru! NO! NO! Asa is out! Damn. Kuyashii.

Next. 37.5 meter run over benches. Kawaguchi Tomohiro is through! Casey is back! Some other guys are out! Kubota is out! Miyagi doesn't make it! Only Urushihara, Kawaguchi and Hashimoto are though! I believe they have fifteen seconds.

Trampoline time! Hey, I guess Casey didn't do that well. Hint, the guy in the long white jacket will make it.

It's a...dammit, I don't know what that thing is called. It's not a pole vault. The first guy fails! Kawaguchi up next! He just got married! That means that he'll have someone to cry for him.

CMs

What the hell is that Jinro commercial about?

OK. It's a high jump with a trampoline.

Get your phones out and download the SASUKE game!

Kawaguchi up next. Yes! Do they HAVE to do the flip?

His wife is relieved. Maeda something is out. Mr. Youtube video guy Tomino Keita is out!

Hashimoto! He's a sports instructor and former gymnast. Here he goes. YES!

He's through! That's two!

Sato Hiroki! Nomura clear! One more guy clear! Urushihara Yuji! Up next!

He's finished SASUKE Park fifteen times!

And he's through! That's it! SASUKE Park All-Stars REPRESENT!

And more fluff as we get Levi on Nagano's boat.

CMs.

Let's go to Narita Airport! Levi! SA-su-ke.

Well, that's awkward. I'm pretty sure that this whole "relationship" is at least a bit manufactured.

Shots of Levi doing..um..fisherman stuff. Levi isn't as strong as Nagano though, so he's a bit slower.

And then let's go to Gifu! And visit Toshihiro Takeda! Hey, maybe they'll fight a fire together! At Mr. SASUKE's house.

This is basically Levi doing the things that we've seen Nagano and Takeda do in their promo videos.

Luci Romberg! David Campbell! Yaruzo!

Lee Yen Chi! He's back!

The Muscle Musical! More Monster 9 synergy as they promote their new show, Treasure.

I see Ayako Inada. Shimada Hiroyo . Tatsumi and Kawashima Takayuki.

Mr. SASUKE! In 20, he fell. In 21, he timed out.

Oy vey. Did he get a letter from a sick child?

Back. The staff give him a letter. On Chip n Dale stationary. Oh crap. A sick child.

His (dying?) message is to see Yamada make the 2nd Stage. Well, that's just going to make me feel like a dick. Note that the he doesn't want Yamada to make the Final Stage. Just the 2nd Stage. He may be dying but he's not stupid.

And the kid is there! He's eight. He meets all the All-Stars and........OH...that's probably what that blog that links to Make a Wish Japan I found is about.

Matsunaga! He's back! He failed the Salmon Ladder last time.

Kitagawa Tomoki! He was at Sportsman No. 1 in 2009.

Paul ANTHONY Terek! He's back! Let's take a look at his run in 17. He failed the Cliff Hanger. He's going all the way to the top!

Okuyama Yoshiyuki! He's back! Remember, SASUKE is like his Olympics! Hey, I can give you a link to where he works. He failed the Stick Slider last time, something most people thought was impossible.

CMs.

And more teasing as we see someone taking on the Final Stage.

Back!

Yamada! Takeda! Nagano! Miyazaki (99). Miyashita! Nakao! Sato (90). Kojima! Yamamoto! Nochi! Kasuga! Wakky! Shoji! Levi! Terek! Kitagawa!

The Final Stage! It's all lit up! And ready! And so am I!

SASUKE 22 tomorrow!

SASUKE Navi September 14, 2008 Sort of Liveblog! サスケナビ!

Thanks to the wonders of technology, I'll actually get to watch the SASUKE Navi for SASUKE 21/SASUKE 2008 Fall.

Who will we see? What will we know? Why do we care? It's SASUKE Navi!

Takuya Kimura ensures that I will never buy Levi jeans.

Here we go! And they already show some people falling the opening.

We see Miyazaki. Yamamoto from ロバート.

People! Are! Waiting! In! Line! Feel the excitement!

Kazuma Asa 朝一眞 has something written on his back again.

Lots of comedians. Wakky ワッキー. Moeyan　モエヤン. The wine guys. Dammit, I need to figure out their names. I know who they are but don't remember. OK, they are 髭男爵 (Higedanshaku). The guy with the beard is Louis Yamada the 53rd 山田ルイ53世 and the other is Higuchi-kun ひぐち君.

Mitsuomi Takahashi gets in a few words.

Wait, are all. No never mind. Only Hiroshi Yamamoto 山本博is going to compete from ロバート. He's talking about getting his pro boxing license. There was a TV special about him trying to get his license before sometime last year. Adriaaaan!

Lookit the constant OA graphic in the left corner.

Dante! ダンテ! I hope they show him screwing up on the Shot-Gun Touch again. Instead they show his latest softbank commercial. Dante does the Monster Box from last year's Geinojin Sportsman No. 1.

He's a bit worried. He goes to a gym to do some in-door rock climbing. This is scintillating! Oh, OK. Pulling yourself up on the grips is pretty cool.

And Dante didn't know that only 2 people have ever completed the course out of 2000 tries.

Masaki Nomura 野村将希 and Kenjiro Ishimaru 石丸謙二郎 are a combined 109 years old!

Passion Yara! パッション屋良 He lifts weights!

Hiromichi Sato 佐藤弘道. In his SASUKE debut he fell to the Flying Chute. Then the Log Grip in 19. In 20 he made it to the Flying Chute again but couldn't get to the platform in time.

Wakky! He's still the current Geinojin Sportsman No. 1 since they haven't had one this year yet. He got a car for that I believe. We look at his run from 20 again. He didn't make it to the platform at the Half-Pipe Attack.

His goal this time is to complete the course!

Beijing Olympics footage! CMs.

Um. OK. Dark Temptation? Oy vey.

The actual commercial for the show shows some people wiping out and someone doing a neat little useless flip befor the Jumping Spider.

We see footage of Tomohiro Matsunaga 松永共広, who won the Silver medal in men's wrestling at the Beijing Olypics. Then we see the man that beat him, Henry Cejudo ヘンリー・セジュード arriving at the airport.

Henry calls it Ninja Warrior! Dammit man!

Daisuke "Balls" Miyazaki 宮﨑大輔 and his handball teammates, Katsuyuki Urawa 浦和克行, Sho Iwanaga 岩永生 and Masakatsu Izuma 猪妻正活!

Let's go back to the January Asia Handball championships. Unfortunately, Japan didn't make it but the team is getting ready for London '12!

They show the failures of the Miyazaki and his teammates from SASUKE 20. For those who bitch about the fact that Miyazaki has such a high number (97) the newspaper should say it all. Famous athletes bring more coverage to the show. Ratings go up. Show stays on the air.

They show footage from the handball event in Muscle Park from August. Handball looks really fun. Men and women got the hots for Daisuke!

They go into Muscle Park and do the Kick Target, the pitching one that I forget the name of - wait, it's called Struck-Out - and Kinjiro. He talks about his Sportsman No. 1 experiences. He's only the second person to win two Sportsman No. 1s.

They go into Ranking Park, which is more about agility and balance than strength.

CMs. Bad day for college football for me today. Notre Dame beat Michigan which is good but Notre Dame still has a ways to go, UH got blown out by Oregon State and a giant blimp did not smash onto the field during the OSU-USC game.

Back! Another probable commercial for SASUKE. We see Cejudo, Matsunaga, Dante, Wakky, Nagano and Miyazaki.

Miyazaki tries out one of the events in Ranking Park.

Then we see handball boys try out the Salmon Ladder in Sasuke Park.

Let's relive Koji Yamada and Yuuji Washimi's failures from 19.

It's hard for the others to do the Salmon Ladder so let's see Daisuke try! And he does! Then he goes for the Shin-Cliff Hanger. But he can't get the grip on it to start off.

And it's the Muscle Musical people!

They show them at work and umm..work. Who will be there!

Hey! It's. Um. I don't know their names. One of them is Eiji Satoda 脊戸田英次. I think the next one is Tomoyo Haga 芳賀友也. Takayuki Kawashima 川島孝幸! They show his attempt at the Final Stage during SASUKE 1 in 1997.

Tatsumi? 龍美? Is that his name? He's an acrobat artist.

And there's Naoki Iketani 池谷直樹. He's been on 13 times and made it to the 3rd stage 6 times but he failed on the Spider Walk portion of the Jumping Spider.

And Daisuke Nakata 中田大輔! He's been on 8 times and reached the 3rd stage 4 times. Looks like he's in good shape. But is the arm OK?

So did they run from the theater to the...oh wait. They are training for the course. Wow, Hiromitsu Takahashi 高橋博光 is trying again. My that's a lot of them. About 12 of them? And no females this time. Hrm. Sexists.

The SASUKE All-Stars! Nagano looks like he's cut his hair. Wait, they showed Nagano, Takeda, Yamada and Yamamoto. They lied to us! They lied to us!

And there's Arsenette's Miyazaki Beach Sports event footage. Or maybe not. They show Nagano finishing the course in 17. Then they cover Takeda. I never got a chance to steal one of those posters.

OK, there they are at the beach. Takeda is white white white.

Then they say screw you Miyazaki and go to the Maguro Festival. Show Takeda and the little girl again! Haha. Takeda is such a show-off doing everything so damn fast.

Oh. There's something new. Need to look that event up.

BUG IN MIKI!

And then they DO go to the Beach Sports Miyazaki event. They do the beach flags. There's an arm-wrestling event. Then the main event!

Swing Ladder. Pipe Slider. Rope Maze. Salmon Ladder. Whoa. Nagano is DARK. Salmon Ladder into the Jumping Bars. Old version Cliff-Hanger. So did anyone make SASUKE from here?

They go down to Kagoshima prefecture. Makoto Nagano 長野誠 is just sort of cruising around. Perhaps looking for chicks? Nagano doing the thing that he does most of the year - training. Hey, he does have another T-shirt.

They remind us that he wiped out on the first obstacle of the 2nd stage at 20.

This time he thinks he can get to the 3rd stage!

Let's go to the forests of Gifu where Toshihiro Takeda 竹田敏浩 is looking at pornography information on his laptop at work.

At SASUKE 19 Takeda timed out before reaching the Flying Chute. At 20, he was so close but he was just short.

He has a dream to reach the rope of the Final Stage. Certain jobs really do lend themselves to practicing for SASUKE, don't they?

And it's Mr. SASUKE. OK, I think that was the Random Muscle Park Guy who failed at the Log Grip. WAS THAT LEVI DOING THE FLIP?

CMs.

The new SASUKE game for the keitai!

Shingo Yamamoto 山本進悟! Katsumi Yamada 山田勝己! They show their past success and failures. AND OF COURSE THEY SHOW THE CLIP OF YAMADA CRYING! I love you TBS.

They re-run the Muscle Park event clips from SASUKE Maniac because they have to plug the game somehow. Nothing much new here. They show the rope part of the Final Stage. Is that all there is to the Final Stage? If someone sends me 8000 yen I can find out for sure.

Shingo seems so awkward doing public appearances.

Shingo goes to Mt. Fuji! Yeah yeah. But what about the guy who had to carry the freaking camera up the mountain?

OH WAIT. There's Bunpei Shirotori 白鳥文平. Okaerinasai! He's back!

Last time he was there he took too long on the Soritatsu Kabe and timed out at the Flying Chute.

At Narita airport! It's Levi "Hits" Meeuwenberg リーヴァイ・ミューエンバーグ! Let's show that freerunning clip again!

We look at his run from 20. Of course we know that he was the only person to make it to the 3rd stage where he failed at the Shin-Cliff Hanger.

He feels even more confident! And there are the other ANC winners.

CMs.

Back to Narita. The three ANC winners! OK. It was definitely one of these people who did the flip.

Lee Yen Chi! Or Lee Enchi if you want リー・エンチ. Whatever. He's back! He WILL clear the 1st Stage! Or so he says.

And that's it! See everyone later tonight for SASUKE Maniac!